the other half

Today I got to experience how the other half lives.  A church member took me out to lunch at Woodlands, the only 5 star and 5 diamond restaurant and inn in SC, and one of only five in the country. 

The experience began as I got into his car – a real fancy Mercedes, and it started without him using a key!   I felt a little like Joey from Blossom – Whoa!  But tried to play it cool.

We pull up to the front of the mansion, and just get out of the car and walk in.   I’m thinking, is he just going to leave his car there?  But no, we get inside and he is greeted, “Oh, hi Mr. D – I’ll move your car”  Dude, they know him by name. 

Then we enter the dining room and are taken to our table.   The hostess pulls out my chair, pushes back in, and PUTS MY NAPKIN IN MY LAP.  I open the menu hesitantly, but was surprised to see that the prices weren’t really as high as you might expect.  When the waitress came, Mr. D told her it was my first time, and she proceded to give me a complete history of the inn, right there off the top of her head. 

Then she took our drink orders – I was told that I had to have the “peach infused tea” – which comes unsweetened, but they bring a tiny pitcher of liquid sweetener that actually sweetens rather than sinking to the bottom of the glass.  I then ordered the item that had “chicken” in the title, thinking that would be a safe bet.

A tiny bit of food was delivered on a giant plate with miniature trees and clover as accents.  But that tiny bit of pecan crusted chicken and tablespoon of mashed potatoes with a cherry glaze was the best tiny bit of food I have ever tasted.  ever.  Then we got dessert – apple cobler with a tiny dollop o f ice cream – also divine.  Aparently tiny dollops are fancier than the large scoops you get at other restaurants.

Then we got ready to leave, and I went to the restroom.  Also fancy.  They didn’t have hand dryers or paper towels, but a stack of actual white towels with a bin for the used ones.  But what really took the cake was the spare roll of toilet paper, WRAPPED IN TULLE TIED UP WITH A BOW.

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